Tag Archives: self reflection

The Force Field

Ever since I was very little I apparently have be able to have long in-depth conversations with complete strangers. My mom has told me that when I was three I would sit on a bench next to someone and start up a conversation.  I think this is where it all began. 

Yesterday I got a call from the wrong number and it was a lady looking for her friend George whose wife is dying from cancer. I was out to dinner and normally wouldn’t answer a call from an unknown number but Owen was having his first sleepover at Nana and Poppy’s and I was convinced it was the hospital calling to tell me he had an accident.  I had a whole scenario already played out in my head about this fictitious accident (the joys of motherhood).   In this scenario he was so upset that I left him that he threw himself down the stairs at their house and broke his leg. Obviously Nana and Poppy are very capable of taking care of him otherwise I wouldn’t have done the sleepover but I was convinced he would miss me and not be able to handle it.   Not the case whatsoever.  I think its safe to say that he was not phased at all about spending his first night without me.  I, on the other hand, did not do as well. 

Anyway, so I answered the call and the lady asked if I was George. I was planning on telling her I was glad it wasn’t the hospital but before I could she went into the whole story about her friend George’s wife and the cancer, crying. Nick was in the bathroom and missed the whole conversation but I posted on facebook  about how the weirdest stuff happens to me and an old friend of mine commented back and said that I have no force field and that she has seen me have these types of conversations with strangers.

So I started thinking about this. I honestly can’t think of a reason why I do this or why these situations  happen to me.  How does it even start? Am I giving off some sort of body language that says, “come over here and tell me your problems”? Or is my friend right about my lack of force field? Do I not have the invisible field around me keeping strangers away? Are you born with this force field or do you develop it over time? Why don’t I have one?  Maybe I missed this day in Psychology 101 about the force field. 

I don’t think I can stop it and I don’t see why I should or need to but why is  one person over another more susceptible to these situations? 

My mom also pointed out that I have a tendency to make friends with some relatively unstable people, have a short and turbulent friendship with them and then it ends for one reason or another.  This may be a force field problem as well.  A simple conversation with a stranger turns in to a weird friendship that will never last. 

I hate self reflecting.